Eat, Drink, and . . . Try Not to Get Fat!

Big weekend coming up.

I have people coming from all over the place. There will be food. There will be drinks. There will probably be more calories consumed in the next three days than what I've had for the entire month of August. At least I can admit that.

I want to have fun. I want to eat and drink whatever. And I certainly don't want to be "that girl" who doesn't eat while her friends are. Or who orders a salad (not that I eat salad, anyway, unless it's doused in ceasar dressing and covered in parmesan cheese) while all her friends are muching away on real food. I.refuse.to.be.that.girl.

My goal for this weekend is to have the time of my life.
My goal for next week is to neither gain or lose. I just want to maintain.

I should meet my August goal of 10 pounds when I weigh in tomorrow morning. I was just one pound shy last week. So I suppose that means it's time to set a September goal! I want to lose 10 more pounds below my August goal by the time my Jaybird turns two on October 10th. I have a lot going on in September, though, so I think I'm going to set my goal at eight pounds rather than ten. If I can survive the funnel cakes and turkey legs at the fair in Memphis later that month . . . well, that's a whole other goal met right there!

No daily menu for tomorrow. Or Saturday. Or Sunday. Or Monday. Eeek! I'm so used to planning what I eat, I'll have no idea what to do when I wake up tomorrow morning and don't have anything planned! ;)

All The Right (or Wrong) Reasons

I've always heard that in order to lose weight and keep it off, you have to do it for the right reasons.

Is wanting to look smokin' hot when I have to see the hubby's ex next month a good enough reason?

I actually met her for the first time back in June. I was about six weeks post-partum and around 20-25 pounds heavier than I am right now. She is devoted to twice-weekly Jazzercise classes (are we in 1988? I didn't even know people still did those). So, pretty much, her waist looked about as big around as one of my monsterous thighs.

Sigh.

I just want her to see me this time and not have it running through her head: "He went for a fatty?"

Probably not the BEST inspiration but, hey, if it means another five or so pounds gone by the time we go to Memphis next month then . . .

Daily Menu for Thursday:

Breakfast:
Pancakes
Total Points: 4

Lunch:
Chicken Nachos
Total Points: 5

Snack:
Apples with Caramel
Total Points: 2

Dinner:
Ham and Swiss Sandwhich
Chips
Total Points: 6

Snack:
Hersheys Stick
Total Points 1

Total Daily Points: 18

Hey, Who's the Skinny Chick?

I'm not sure if other people do this or if I'm the only weirdo.

I do not have a full length mirror. Every once in a while, I'll consider picking up an el cheap-o from Walmart and everytime my husband gives me the old, "Oh no, don't get one of those. I wanna get you one of the good, wooden swivel ones." This has been going on since January. I need to break down and just buy the damn cheapie!

Since I do not have a mirror in order to critique potential outfits, I use my digital camera. What did we do in the days before digital technology? Oh yeah, I used to stand on my bed so I could check myself out using the mirror over my dresser . . .

Anyhoo . . . I have a Girls Night Out planned for Friday night. First one in aaaaages considering I've been pregnant the past five million years (or at least it feels that way). So, of course, I want to look good. And, of course, all clothes are outdated. Most of them scream "2005!" My shoes are either so not right for going out or so ouch-hurt-so-bad-don't-even-wanna-think-about-wearing. I tried on the entire contents of the Single Girl portion of my closet today. And while the end result was: you must go shopping at once. I did figure something out while looking at the pictures of the outfits.

There was a skinny chick in my clothes today!

Look! Here she is:

* Please ignore the gaudy necklace and the 'I have no makeup on and have been scrubbing toilets all day' face *

Generally, when I look at pictures of myself, I don't really see a girl who has lost a lot of weight in the past few months. I might when I compare them with old pictures, but not just to look at them on their own. But with that one, my first thought was "wow, I actually look SKINNY!"

Of course, a second and third look had me turning to negativity: my hips are really wide, it's probably just the angle of the camera, it's the shoes - the heels are so tall they make me look taller and leaner. *Pushing negativity aside* I'm proud of the way I look in that picture!

In other news: I wonder how many calories you burn by scrubbing a bathtub with a two-year-old on your back yelling, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!" Hmmm . . .

Daily Menu for Wednesday:

Breakfast:
2 Cinnamon Rolls
Total Points: 4

Lunch:
Mexican Pizza
Chips
Total Points: 5

Snack:
Skinny Cow Icecream Bar
Total Points: 1

Dinner
Chicken Mignon
Baked Potato
Green Beans
Garlic Bread
Total Points: 8

Snack:
2 Haystacks
Total Points: 2

Total Daily Points: 20

Reading Can Be Hazardous to Your Weight Loss?

There aren't too many things in this world better than relaxing in a bubble bath with your beverage of choice and a good book. It's one of my favorite things to do and if I had the time (read: if I did not have small children) I would do it every single night. I really love a good book. I always have and probably always will. I can remember scouring the used book stores with my dad when I was a little girl, looking for dog-eared copies of Babysitters Club or Sweet Valley books. I have to read at least a chapter of a book every night before I go to sleep . . . no matter how late it is when I finally get to crawl into bed. My husband contends that all this reading makes me a NERD, but what does he know? He's the guy who DVR's episodes of Star Trek.

One of my all-time favorite authors is John Grisham. His newest paperbook is titled Playing for Pizza and I am currently 3/4 of the way through it. Even though it has the word pizza in the title, it never occured to me that chapter after chapter would leave me hungry. And not just hungry for more . . . but hungry for PASTA!

The book is about football. But it's also set in Italy. The paragraphs describe the pastas and the sauces and the cheeses in such detail that my mouth will be watering and I'll find myself dreaming of tortelini and linguini and fettucini . . . all those wonderful carb-filled goodies the boot-shaped country gave us.

The book also led me to discover the wonders of whole wheat pasta, however, and for that reason I'll forever be thankful to Mr. Grisham. I picked up a box of penne noodles at 3 weight watchers points per serving and I'm pretty sure I'm in lust. The hubs even said he couldn't tell a difference between it and regular pasta.

I'm so glad I live in a world where there are healthy choices for us big fat fatties!

Tuesday's Menu:

Breakfast:
Egg Beaters
1 slice bacon
1 cinnamon roll
Total Points: 4

Lunch:
Pasta (more leftovers, baybay!)
Garlic Bread
Total Points: 5

Snack:
2 Haystacks
Total Points: 2

Dinner:
Corndogs
Oven Fries
Total Points: 8

Snack:
Apple Slices with caramel
Total Points: 2

Total Daily Points: 21

Hello, Lover

I love juice! I love it. Love it, love, love it.

Unfortunately, however, even the "lite" varieties have more calories than I'm really crazy about ingesting in liquid form. And most of them are - at most - 5% actual juice -- and that's if you're lucky! So I had been on a juice hiatus since early June. No fun. No fun a'tall.

BUT.

Last night, I was out buying groceries and stopped to look over all the bajillion varities of on the go packs. I would seriously LOVE to be whoever came up with that idea. Sugar free packet of "mmph" to add to your bottled water. Who wouldn't love it? I think it started with Crystal Lite (the strawberry is like crack, yo). And now Lipton (Mmmm! Honey Lemon Green Tea), Hawaiian Tropic (lemonberry - 'ello!), Kool-Aid, Gatorade Propel . . . they all have their own varities.

And so does Ocean Spray.

And they have . . . wait for it . . .

Cran-Grape!

I could take a bath in Cran-Grape juice (ya know, if it wouldn't dye my skin and leave me looking all purple-y). I effin' love that stuff!

I bought a box of them and added one of the packs to my water this morning. Not quite the same as the sugary stuff, but a hella good substitute. I'm 99% sure that I'm in love!

Daily Menu for Monday:

Breakfast:
2 Cinnamon Rolls
Total Points: 4

Lunch:
Penne Pasta
Garlic Bread
Total Points: 5

Snack:
Chocolate Mousse
Total Points: 3

Dinner:
Chicken Fried Steak
Mashed Potatoes
Green Beans
Bread
Total Points: 8

Snack:
Apples with Caramel
Total Points: 3

Daily Total: 19

The Boob Fairy Giveth. And the Boob Fairy Taketh Away.

I asked my mom for my first bra when I was in the fifth grade. Jayla, the girl who set in front of me in class, had one. She didn't need it anymore than I did but you could see the straps through her thin t-shirts. I wanted people to be able to see the straps through my t-shirts.

So, for Christmas that year I got a pink training bra with a pair of matching panties. I was ecstatic. Except for the fact that it was obvioulsy a training bra made for a 6 foot tall adolescent. The shoulder straps were way, way too long and I had to tuck them under the back strap in order for the bra to fit right. Nothing like having nada to hold the straps up!

A few years later, all those "I must increase my bust" exercises (or maybe it was genetics? Hmm) paid off and I was blessed with BOOBS. Hooters. Ta-ta's. A pair. Chi-chi's. I hated them in junior high (hello! Disgusting boys!), but as time went on I learned just how much power a woman holds in a pair of nice ni-ni's.

I've always known my best ASSets and have done what I can to play them up. In my clubbing days that meant a shirt cut down to WHERE with HOLY CLEAVAGE, Batman! Yup, as a young adult I embraced having big boobs. I loved having them. People would complain, "Ohhhh, I have Double D's and my back hurts soooo bad." Pshaw. I was the few, the proud, the big boobed. I even put little gems like these on my Myspace page:

But, alas, all good things must come to an end.

After the birth of my first son, the girls just sort of deflated. I would undress and sing to myself, "Do your boobs hang low, do they wobble to and fro . . . " They kept their size and with a good, gravity defying over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder, we were in bidness. This time around . . . no such luck. My post-partum breasticles swelled up to Pamela Anderson porportions, but those days are as dead as the wilted cabbage leaves I stuck in my bra.

My boobs. Have left. The building.

I suppose I saw it coming. I noticed shirts and bras fitting just slightly different. But then, this morning, as I was heating a bottle for the baby and Hubs was getting ready to report to drill, he asked: "Do you think you'd ever get implants?"

I would have been offended if not enthralled with the idea that maybe he was offering to pay for them.

Hubs is a butt man, too, so I'm guessing the El Ninas have definitely become minimized if he's going to comment on them.

The price we pay when it comes to weight loss . . .

** On a sidenote, I belong to enough Mommy groups and message boards to know that Boobs are for Babies. However, since mine decided not to cooperate for the most part in that aspect they are merely there for decoration. And now they can't even do that right!

Sunday's Daily Menu:

Breakfast
Apple Cinnamon Pancakes
Total Points: 4

Lunch:
Ham and Swiss Sandwhich
2 Rice Cakes
Total Points: 6

Snack:
Skinny Cow Icecream Bar
Total Points: 1

Dinner
Turkey Meatballs
Baked Potato
Green Beans
Garlic Bread
Total Points: 9

Snack:
Apples with caramel
Total Points: 1

Total Daily Points: 22

Nothing Snaps Ya Out of a "Feeling Fat" Funk . . .

. . . quite like a weigh-in where you've lost three more pounds! Can I get a hell yeah? I am kicking ass and taking names at this weight loss game. And I feel great.

I have already lost nine pounds for the month. So barring anything major, I should definitely meet my goal of losing 10 pounds by the time I weigh-in next Friday. Wouldn't it be awesome if I could lose three again? Especially with next weekend's drunken debauchery (and all the calorie consumption that goes along with it).

Woo Hoo!

Today's progress picture:

I have a feeling the fam and I will be eating out tomorrow night. Especially considering there's nothing to cook that Hubs will actually eat (he won't touch my Morning Star crumbles with a ten-foot pole). So my daily menu just goes through afternoon snack.

Daily Menu for Saturday:

Breakfast
Cinnamon Toast
Points: 2

Lunch:
Onion Rings
Hershey Stick
Total Points: 3

Snack:
Brownie Sundae
Total Points: 3

Points before dinner: 8

Teach the Children Well . . .

It's pretty much common sense that our kids learn their eating habits from us. Duh. Who else are they going to learn them from?

I remember before I even had my first son, I would always say that I just wouldn't give my kids sugary foods and therefore they wouldn't become addicted. Even though I'm not quite two years into this whole Mommy game, I know that is the recipe for disaster. The key is finding balance.

My own parents didn't do me any favors. I can remember discussing "new" Coke vs. Coca Cola Classic with my grandparents. The new coke flavor was introduced in 1985. I was five years old! (For the record, like everyone else in America I was all about the coke classic). It's no wonder that I'm an addict! I may not have touched a coke in over two months, but I think of it like an alcoholic - once an addict, always an addict. And, to be perfectly honest, I'm salivating just at the sight of that coke classic can!

My oldest drinks water. That's it. I flavor it with on the go packs (he prefers the Walmart brand, apple flavor) and he doesn't know that it's any different from juice. I know it's something small, but it does make me feel like I'm doing something just a wee bit better for my baby. When he's older and has to make his own choices, he might not rely on good eating habits but at least I am instilling them in him now. I'm trying.

I'll be honest, too, nothing makes me feel better than knowing when he asks for "cake," he means a rice cake. And when he wants a "cookie," it's a Quaker mini-delights. His favorite kind of chips are baked Doritos. He'll eat ground turkey or Boca meatless or egg beaters without giving it a second thought. I guess the key really is to start them young. =)

Daily Menu for Friday:

Breakfast:
Egg beaters
2 slices bacon
1 slice toast
Total: 4 pts

Lunch:
Turkey Sandwhich
Nectarine
Total: 5 pts

Snack:
Vanilla pudding
Caramel rice cake
Total: 2 pts

Dinner:
Quesadillas
Chips
Total: 10 pts

Daily Total: 21 pts

Thursday's Eatins

Breakfast:

Blueberry Pancakes
Total points: 4

Lunch:
Mexican Pizza
Chips
Total Points: 5

Snack:
Upside Down Chocolate Cream Pie
Total Points: 3

Dinner:
Honey Mustard Salmon
Corn on the Cob
Green Beans
Bread
Total points: 5

Snack:
Apples with caramel
Total points: 2

Total Points: 19

Go for the Gold

Everytime I watch the Olympics, I think of two things. First, that every GD man in America should have a set of abs like Michael Phelps! Hubba Hubba Yum-o. I would eat chocolate syrup off that man and even lick the pool that collected in his belly button. His ears may be bigger than Will Smith, Barack Obama, and my cousin Paul put together but hot damn you can have some Dumbo ears when you're sporting man pecs like that!

Next, I think of the 1988 games in Seoul, South Korea. To be honest, the only medalist I really remember is FloJo. But I remember watching the swimming and dreaming of how that would be me one day. I was eight years old and, at that time, my biggest dream was to one day swim in the Olympics. I hadn't had any formal training since swim classes as a pre-schooler and my folks didn't exactly have the funds to spring for a coach and everything that goes into it. The farthest I made toward my dream was racing my brother in the pool on vacation. But I won the gold medal everytime that way. ;)

One hour of swimming at a moderate level burns more than 500 calories. Maybe it's time to once again pick up my favorite sport! I doubt I'll ever make it to the Olympics (hello, Dara Torres!) but maybe I could find a coach who looks like Michael Phelps! ;)

Daily Menu for Wednesday:

Breakfast
2 slices cinnamon toast
1 Kiwi
Total: 3 pts

Lunch
Buffalo chicken snacks
Total: 9 pts

Snack
Chocolate Mousse Cone
Total: 2 pts

Dinner
Monterrey Chicken
Mashed potatoes
Corn
Total: 8 pts

Snack:
Hershey's stick
Total: 1 pt

Daily Total: 22 pts

Holy Mojito!

I am of the opinion that there are certain things in life that make it worth the while. And a good cocktail is one of those certain things. My drink of choice is a Mojito - preferably mango flavored. Both Parrot Bay and Bicardi recently came out with pre-bottled Mojitos. Just like a wine cooler only much-o tastier. I absolutely l-o-v-e LOVE them! I had three Saturday night -- using my flex points.

Of course, they don't print nutritional information on any kind of alcoholic beverages, but I was curious. I searched through hell and high water (okay, not really . . . ) but finally found the calorie count using The Daily Plate. Just one not quite 12 ounce bottle of that nectar of the gods is 234 calories! Holy Mojito! That's five weight watchers points. That's a bacon sandwhich with swiss cheese. That's one and 3/4 of the Mexican pizzas I had for dinner tonight. That's . . . that's . . . that's a lot of points!

Why does good stuff = fatty stuff? Blah!

I have a recipe for a 2-pt Mojito in my Hungry Girl cookbook. I think it's time to give that bad boy a try!

Today has been tough for me in that I have wanted to stuff my face with everything in sight. It feels like I'm about half a day away from Mother Nature showing up at my doorstep to deliver my monthly gift. But I know the timing isn't right for that. I felt like this at the beginning of my last pregnancy, but ummm .. . timing wouldn't be right for that either. Unless it was somehow divine intervention. And, from what I understand, the Big Guy upstairs seems to prefer virgins for that sort of thing. Whatever it is, I hope it passes me over and quickly or Imma have to add padlocks to my pantry.

Daily Menu for Tuesday:

Breakfast:
1/2 cup hashbrowns
Egg beaters
2 slices bacon
Total points: 4

Lunch:
Turkey sandwhich
Apple slices with caramel
Total points: 6

Snack
Chocolate Mousse Cones
Total points: 2

Dinner:
Veggie burger with cheese
Butternut Squash fries
Baked Beans
Total Points: 10

Daily Total: 22

Fitness, Fitness . . . Can I Get a Witness . . .

I love walking. It's probably my favorite form of exercise and something that I would do even if it wasn't necessary.

Unfortunately, I live in Texas and with the weather this time of year . . . eek. Let's just say that by the time I finish a two mile walk, I look like a Spring Breaker participating in a wet t-shirt contest. Only not as hot. Most of those chicks don't have tennis-balls-in-old-droopy-gym-socks for boobs.

If the boys and I wake up and get breakfast taken care of by 7:30 and the temperate has managed to stay below 85 degrees, then we'll go for a walk. I'm usually still sweating by the time we get home regardless . . . but, it's better than trying to walk away the pounds once the day has worn on and the temps have risen even more.

The weather the past few days has been extremely uncharacteristic for Texas in August and the boys and I have been able to take several walks (still in the morning, though, it may not be 106 degrees at 5:00 but hot is hot, and this fat girl don't play)! This morning, we did the normal walk around the subdivision and also stopped at the park. My toddler was able to play on the playground while my baby and I did laps around the perimeter of it. I'm so read for fall when this can become a regular part of our daily routine. It's a win-win. I get the exercise and my kiddo is worn out from playing hard. Can't beat it!

So what kind of exercise is one to do when it's hotashell outside? Well, I am one lucky beyotch. The hubs bought an exercise bike back in 2004 -- before we even met and while I was still a party girl with a taunt tummy (day-umn, four years can change things!) The bike had set in a box until a month or so ago when he put it together for me. So now I am able to peddle away the pounds.

I love it. I do.

And I've figured out the best possible way to peddle away the time as I'm peddling away the pounds.

I have perfected the art of balancing my laptop while I'm on the bike. My hubs swears it's a way-tooo-funny for words sight. But, I really don't care. It helps. This afternoon, in fact, I was plugging away looking at different weight loss blogs. I was so in my own little world that when I finally took the time to look at the counter, I had peddled for 80 minutes! I figured if I could do 80 then I could sure as hell do 90. By the time I made it to 90 minutes, I had gone 20 miles and burned 396 calories. No way I was stopping there so I peddled a little longer until I reached that 400 calorie mark. My ass hurt like hell when I got off and I know I was walking like a cowboy, but damn . . . 90 minutes, 20 miles, 400 calories? That'll make a girl feel goooood!

Monday's Menu:

Breakfast:
Biscuts with honey
Points: 6

Lunch:
Bacon Swiss sandwich
Gerber puffs
Points: 7

Snack:
S'more Sundae
Points: 3

Dinner:
Mexican Pizza
Chips
Points: 6

Total Points: 22

Attack of the What If's

I decided to check out some other weight loss blogs this morning. I was looking to them for inspiration, recipe ideas, that sort of thing. What I found was, eh, kinda discouraging. It seemed as though every single blog I looked at began with sentences like these:

"Well, I fell off the wagon again."
"I am ashamed to say I gained back everything I lost plus five pounds."

Holy discouragement, Batman!

Then the what if's begin.

What if that's me one of these days?
What if I fall off the wagon?
What if I gain it all back?
What if 'just this once' becomes 'okay, once more' and then 'last time, I swear' until I'm back to my old habits and fat and miserable on top of it all?

What if, what if, what if.

I can't do that. I can't be that person. But it's already happened before.

I lost 51 pounds from the birth of my first son until he was six months old. I felt great, looked great, and even though I still had another 20 or so I could stand to lose, I slacked off. Fast food breakfasts, a 2-liter of coke a day, one too many cocktails. Before I knew it, 20 pounds of that was back on. And then I was pregnant again. It irritates me that I did that to myself. If I hadn't eaten myself back up those 20 pounds, I would be so much closer to my goal NOW.

I'm doing things different this time. I'm doing things smarter. And I hope that's enough. Being a 'fell off the wagon' statistic is not on my agenda!

Menu for Sunday:

Breakfast
Blueberry pancakes
Total points: 4

Lunch
3 bagel pizzas
1 Hershey stick
Total points: 4

Snack
2 Haystacks
Total points: 2

Dinner
Cheese stuffed chicken paremsan
Garlic mashed potatoes
Green beans
Garlic bread
Total points: 7

Snack
Apples with caramel
Total points: 2

Total Daily Points: 19

And Another One Gone and Another One Gone . . .

Friday = Weigh In.

Somehow, someway I manged to lose four pounds this past week. Four! *Pats self on back* I'm not sure how that happened since I had been stuck in the two-a-week zone, but I will most definitely take it. The four pound weight loss means my maximum points for the day drop down by one, but it's all goooood. ;)

I am now down a total of 45 pounds and have 29 to go before I meet my goal. I should definitely meet my August goal as well. I have two weeks to go and four more pounds to go.

Today is also one of those "celebrating small successes" days. Why? Because I have gone two months without so much as a sip of Coca-Cola! I absolutely love coke and have for as long as I can remember. But two months without one makes me think I have successfully kicked the habit. Now days when I want a soda, I'll usually make it a Diet Dr. Pepper. But, I'm mostly just chugging down my flavored water. Nothing like getting over a caffeine addiction. My body feels so much better. I wish I'd done this a long time ago!

The hubs comes home tomorrow and we're planning on making it to the Rangers game (weather permitting). This time, however, I'm going prepared. I'm packing turkey hotdogs, veggie burgers, and baked chips. I didn't go crazy last time - far from it - as all I ate was a hot dog (that I shared with my toddler). BUT, this way I'm eating healthy and saving myself $4.50. I will be using my flex points to scarf down those margaritas they sell at the ballpark! I've already given up one vice . . . I cannot say goodbye to my cocktails!

This week's progress picture:

Those jeans are a size smaller than the ones I was wearing in last week's picture! It's almost too bad that the bigger jeans are my favorite pair ever . . .

I found this extra yummy one-point recipe on my favoritest of favorite websites, Hungry-Girl:

Haystacks:

1 cup Fiber One cereal
1 regular sized Hershey bar
1 tbsp reduced fat peanutbutter

Combine Hershey bar and peanutbutter and microwave for 30 seconds. Stir and microwave an additional 15 seconds. Fold in cereal and mix well. Drop onto wax paper in six equal "haystacks." Refrigerate for chocolate to set.

These are each only ONE WW point and they are fuckin' awesome!!

Menu for Saturday (Tentative):
Breakfast:
2 pieces cinnamon toast
2 slices turkey bacon
Total: 4 pts

Lunch:
HG Onion Rings
2 Haystacks
Total: 4 pts

Snack:
Vanilla pudding
Total: 1 pt

Dinner:
Veggie Burger w/cheese
Turkey Dog
Baked chips with salsa
Total: 11 pts

Daily Total: 20 pts
Flex Points: 35 to be drunk in frozen margarita form!

Celebrate the Small Things

I actually managed to survive two days with the hubs home and NOT go off my meal plans for those days. I'm pretty impressed with myself. Of course, fast food was not dangled in my face so this could have had something to do with it. ;)

Friday's Menu:

Breakfast:
2 slices turkey bacon
Egg beaters
1 slice wheat toast
Total points: 4

Lunch
Chicken Nachos
Hershey Bar
Total points: 7

Snack
Chocolate Pudding
Caramel Rice Cake
Total points: 2

Dinner
HC Pizza
Total points: 7

Snack
2 HG Haystacks
Total points: 2

Total points: 22

Lead Me Not Into Temptation . . . I Can Find it Myself!

Ya know, I love my husband dearly but all this eating healthy bidness is so much easier when he's NOT around! He pretty much does not think food is worth eating unless it's been fried. He's of the opinion that any piece of chicken that goes into his mouth should be covered in the fatty skin and bone-in. The words "boneless, skinless" practically make him cringe. And, the biggest thing, he always pulls this on me: "Wanna go to Sonic?" YES, OF COURSE I WANT TO GO TO SONIC! I do not need to go to Sonic. Strawberry Limeades are my ultimate weakness. And it is just oh-so-very hard to go to Sonic and not have one of those. It's just all around better when he doesn't try to tempt me with fast food! Augh!

I do love having him home, though, and look forward to those days. It's just easier when it falls on the weekends -- I'd rather use my flex points then when I have more days until weigh-in! ;D

Since he'll be here tomorrow and I'll be trying to soak up just as much hubs as humanly possible, I went ahead and planned out menus for the next three days. Not such an easy task!

Tuesday:

Breakfast:
2 slices cinnamon toast
Kiwi fruit
Total: 3 WW Points

Lunch:
WW Chicken Enchiladas
Chips
Total: 9 WW pts

Snack:
Skinny Cow Icecream Bar
Total: 1 WW pt

Dinner:
Garlic Parmesan Chicken
Green Beans
Mashed Potatoes
Garlic Bread
Total: 8 WW pts

Snack:
Fruit
Total: 1 WW pt

Total Points: 22

Wednesday:

Breakfast:
2 slices turkey bacon
Egg Beaters
1 slice toast
Total: 4 WW pts

Lunch:
BBQ Chicken Wrap
Apple Slices
Total: 6 WW pts

Snack:
Cherry Cobbler
Total: 4 pts

Dinner:
Grilled Chicken
Baked Beans
Green Beans
Baked Potato
Total: 8 pts

Snack:
Fruit
Total: 1 pt

Daily Total: 23 pts

Thursday:

Breakfast:
Blueberry pancakes
Total: 4 pts

Lunch:
Club Sandwich
Chips
Total: 7 pts

Snack:
Graham crackers w/ frozen chocolate cool whip
Total: 3 pts

Dinner:
WW Turkey and Mashed potatoes
Green Beans
Garlic Bread
Total: 5 pts

Snack:
Fruit
Total: 1 pt

Daily Total: 20 pts

Body Image

I honestly cannot remember a time in my life when I ever truly loved - even liked - my body.

Sad, huh?

Sure, I can look back now and say "what I wouldn't do to have those thighs?" or "why didn't I appreciate perky breasts a little bit more?" But, at the time . . . not so much.

I was a boney kid. All knees and elbows and skeeter bites. I remember the summer after sixth grade, my mother made me go to Vacation Bible School. One of the leaders in my group was a high school boy that I was in l-o-v-e with. We had to make "baseball cards" as one of the activities. It featured a picture of us on the front, wearing a sneer and holding a bat. On the back, we had to list our "stats."

These stats included weight.

Now, I was 12-years-old. I was 5'2" tall and weighed a whopping 85 pounds. But, for whatever reason, I had it in my head that that was too much and I could not let the high school boy know that I weighed that much. So I wrote 5'2 and . . . wait for it . . . 58 lbs!!! on my trading card. LMAO. It's funny now.

Even if the 85 pounds was too much in my pre-teen head, it was too much of the wrong things. It was "too much" in the form of knobby knees and "I look the same from the back as I do from the front." I wanted BOOBS. I read Are You There, God? It's Me Margaret by Judy Blume and would practice the same exercises the girls in the book did every night before I went to bed. I must, I must, I must increase my bust.

It took a couple years, but when that bust finally increased . . . yowza! Did it ever increase! I went from looking like a 10-year-old boy to curvy and soft. Those knees, elbows, and skeeter bites became boobs, butt, and hips.

And I hated it.

I did the junior high thing in the early 1990's. Kate Moss was posing for Calvin Klein in ads where you could count her ribs and with her collar bone jutting out. Sir Mix-a-lot may have liked big butts, but he seemed like the only one. It wasn't "cool" in those days for a white girl from the suburbs to have booty. These days it's everywhere: in hip hop music where they rap about looking for a dime, whose top of the line, cute face, slim waist with a big behind. Even in - of all things - country music, where they sing about a honkey tonk ba-donka-donk. But when parts of my body were starting to curve, so not cool.

I hid the curves by wearing my dad's t-shirts down over my butt. I was in school in the days of the tucked in-then-puffed out shirts and that helped to hide some of the C cups I was hauling around at age 14. But I hated my body. I hated the crude things boys would say. I hated being curvy and wanted nothing more than to be one of the super thin girls . . . the girls with no curves.

I began my senior year of high school in a pair of size eight Eddie Bauer shorts. Now days, I would absolutely die to be in a size eight. I would broadcast it to the world. I would take pictures of every single lable on every size eight article I own and post them everywhere. You would be able to google "size eight" and see my smilin' face.

But, of course, at 17 you never know the power of your own body, of your curves. Surrounded by the Heathers and the Tiffanys in their size 3's, I felt like a hippo.

It was a rough year for me. I was juggling trying to graduate in the top 10 of my class, way too many extracirricular activites, college applications, and all the things that go along with being a senior in high school. My eating habits became the worst they ever were in my life. If I wasn't shoveling Taco Bell down the hatch, it was Arby's or Sonic or the buffet at Pizza Inn.

I started twelfth grade in a pair of size 8 shorts. I graduated twelfth grade in a dress that was a size 13/14. I was embarrassed, humiliated, and hated every single part of my body. But I didn't have the "umph" to do anything about it.

Before I could begin college classes, I had to have a physical done. I can honestly remember gasping when I stepped on the scale: 168 pounds. I couldn't believe it. All the clothes that I bought to begin my classes were a size 14. I was bigger than I had ever been in my life.

And I just so happened to go to Baylor University.

Baylor is pretty much the all of the 18-22 year-olds in the suburbs of Houston, Texas, regurgetated into one place. The girls were tan, blonde, pretty, and rich. And, most of all, they weren't fat. I stuck out like a sore thumb. A decade later, a size 14 seems not that bad. But at age 18, it felt like the worst thing in the world. I felt huge compared to the other girls on campus. I didn't look and see other fat people . . . because I chose not to. In my mind, I was the largest, ugliest girl on that campus. And it was horrible. I hated the feeling.

I can look back now at pictures of those times and point out things about my body that were wonderful. My legs were strong and toned. They had definition, not cellulite. My arms were boney still. My tummy was flat and my boobs were full. But all I could see was 168 pounds, size 14.

The next semester, my mom and I went on a diet. We cut out the junk and we joined a gym. I was only 18 years old and the weight literally flew off of me. By March, I was back in a size 10. I went on a trip to the coast for my 19th birthday in May and wore a 2-piece. But the same old insecurities were there. I thought my "girl bubble" (which is what I called my belly) was too big. I swore I had "thunder thighs." The list could go on and on.

For the next several years, I managed to stay anywhere from a size 10 to a size 12. I had a boyfriend who everyone thought was a sweet guy. And, while he did always tell me I was beautiful, he was also good about making little comments. "Maybe we should go on a diet together." "Hey, let's join the gym." "Let's have a contest to see who can lose the most weight this month." When you're already sensitive about these subjects, comments like that can send you over the edge.

Luckily, I love food too much to be anorexic and I hate throwing up too much to be bullimic. But that doesn't mean I didn't try "not the best approaches" to losing a few pounds here and there. I went on Xenadrine, but it made my heart beat so fast and had me so jittery and nervous that I dropped it after a few weeks. I lost 12 pounds on the Atkins diet, only to regain it as soon as I started eating carbs again. I did the SlimFast diet once and lost about 10 pounds.

That boyfriend and I eventually broke up. I moved away. And, in just a year's time, I packed on more weight than I ever thought was possible. I worked in retail, a crazy schedule, and one of the few people in retail who actually got to sit on their ass all the day. The combination -- no exercise + eating at weird times + eating a combination of vending machine food and fast food -- equaled once again blowing up to a size 14. When I found out I was pregnant in 2006, I was strugging to get in to those 14's. I had to buy maternity clothes before I really needed them just to be able to wear something.

It was after the birth of my first son that I really began to see just how beautiful my body really was . . . at a size 8, a size 10, a size 12, a size 14.

A c-section followed by a nasty infection that led to a surgical debreedment left me with a scar that runs from hip bone to hip bone. It's hidden by a "dunlap . . . " a belly that no Pilates or crunches or sit up will ever get rid of. The boobs, considerably larger than the C-cup they were when I was 14, point to the floor and I cannot leave home without a bra that defies gravity. I have come to terms with the cellulite on my legs. I can live with the wingspan that my arms have become. Because I know there are things that are worse. At least I can do something about those. It will take yet another surgery (a tummy tuck) to get rid of what my gut has become.

Maybe one of these days, I can look at my body fresh out of the shower and say "wow, that chick is hot."

Or maybe one of these days, I'll look at my body fresh out of the shower and say "I wish I'd known what I possessed at 28 . . . "

Daily Menu for Monday:
Breakfast:
2 slices turkey bacon
Egg beaters
Wheat toast
Total: 4 WW pts

Lunch:
2 mini bagel pizzas
Green beans
Total: 4 WW pts

Snack:
Cherry cobbler
Total: 4 WW pts

Dinner:
Taco Salad
Total: 7 WW pts

Snack:
WW chocolate cake
Total: 1 WW pt

Daily Total: 20 WW points

The MOST Wonderful Time of the Year . . . Sorta

We're coming up on my favorite time of the year. As much as I love the hot-hot-hot of summer, I love the everything-is-going-on of the fall! My husband and I sat down the other night and planned out the last four months of 2008. It's going to be very busy and fun. We have two vacations (one with the kiddos and one without), several trips to amusement parks and ballgames, holidays, parties . . . there's just a lot going on!

When I sat my weight loss goals, I tried to be as realistic as possible. If I had begun trying to lose nearly 75 pounds in, say, January then my goals would have been different. It would have been easier to get rid of those last 5 or so pesky pounds . . . if I wasn't going to be trying to lose them around the holidays! But, if I stay on track and lose what I want, when I want . . . then I'll be five pounds to go by the time we have Thanksgiving over and done with.

But the actual getting down to just 5 pounds to go is what's worrying me. Labor Day weekend, I have a bunch of out of town guests coming in. It's going to be a lot of eating, a lot of drinking, a lot of calories, and not a lot of exercise. Just a few weeks later, in mid-September, the hubs and I are taking the kids to Memphis for nine days. Memphis. One of the greatest food cities in the world. Not to mention, Hubs godparents live there and his godmother makes those southern woman specialty ribs. The kind where the meat falls off the bone and they're smothered in "secret family recipe" sauce. And are usually followed up with a heaping slice of chocolate pie. How am I going to be able to say no to all of that?? How can I say no without hurting her feelings?

Football games are another story completely. No, you don't find fall-off-the-bone ribs, but you *do* find frito chili pies and steaming hot chocolate and nachos and, well, ballgame food. I suppose I'll need to come up with a "game plan" of my own if I don't want to end up looking like a linebacker myself!!

I absolutely will have this weight gone by February of next year. No ifs, ands, or buts. BUT it sure would be easier if I wasn't trying to do it with fall right around the corner! *Sigh*

Daily Menu for Sunday:

Breakfast
Apple cinnamon pancakes
Total: 4 pts

Lunch
Bacon Swiss Sandwhich
1/2 Apple
Quaker Mini-Delights
Total: 8 pts

Snack
Smores Sundae
Total: 3 pts

Dinner
Mexi-tato
Total: 5 pts

Snack
Jello with fruit
Total: 1 pt

Total: 21 pts

Three Months Later

My baby will be three months old tomorrow! It's hard to believe. Three months ago today I was roughly the size of a small country and couldn't wait to meet my Boo Boo. Today, I am 41 pounds lighter than the day I delivered him. I'm very proud of myself. ;)

Friday is weigh in day, of course, and I dropped another two pounds this week. I was happy, of course, but part of me was kinda hoping to see at least three pounds gone. I know one to two pounds a week is the realistic target buuuuuut . . .

I have eight more pounds to lose in the next three weeks in order to meet my next goal. That means at least two weeks, I'll have to lose three pounds a week. I dunno if it's going to happen but Imma bust my ass to try!

Here are this week's progression pictures:

I realized after I took the pictures, that I was wearing an outfit that I have a picture of me in around this time last year. I don't know if I can tell much of a difference ('specially since Hubs is in the picture, too) but I am nearly 10 pounds lighter than I was when this one was taken.

I also took new pictures of me with the boys today. In this first one, you can tell that I still have a lot, a lot, a lot of tummy toning to do. And, yup, I'm still using the boys as a "shield!:"

And, in this one, I feel like you see that I've slimmed down in my face:
All in all, I'm pretty proud of myself. I'm not pleased with the way I look right now -- though I know I look better than I did just a month ago. But that's why I'm working on me. To get to a point to where I can honestly say I love my body. ;)

Daily Menu for Saturday:

Breakfast:
2 Ham and cheese croissants
Total: 6 WW points

Lunch:
BBQ Chicken Wrap
Potatoes
Total: 7 WW points

Snack:
Skinny Cow Icecream Bar
Total: 1 WW point

Dinner:
Snicky Snack night!:
Potato Skins
Mozerella Sticks
Fried Pickles
Fried Jalapenos
Total: 7 points

Snack:
Jello with fruit
Total: 1 point

Daily Total: 22 points

Food Fo' Friday

Daily Menu for Friday:

Breakfast:
1 veggie sausage patty
1/4 cup egg beaters
2 pieces toast
Total: 5 WW points

Lunch:
Chicken Cordon Bleu (leftovers!)
Mashed Potatoes
Green Beans
Total: 6 WW points

Snack:
Skinny Cow icecream bar
Total: 1 WW point

Dinner:
Taco Ring
Refried Beans
Chips
Total: 9 WW points

Snack:
Jello
Total: 1 WW point

Total: 22 WW points

Thursday

Daily Menu for Thursday:

Breakfast:
1 Eggo Cinnamon Swirl
Kiwi fruit
Total: 4 points

Lunch:
Veggie burger with cheese
Green beans
Total: 6 points

Snack:
Skinny Cow icecream bar
Total: 1 point

Dinner
Club Sandwhich
Chips
Total: 7 points

Snack
Jello
Total: 1 point

Daily Total: 19 points

Take the Stairs!

I think if there's ever been an anthem for those trying to lose weight everywhere it's these three words: "take the stairs." Every article you read with "hints and tips on how to lose weight" makes sure to include that little nugget of information. Us big fat fatties have had it drilled into our heads from the very first time we opened an issue of Cosmo and read their "10 Tips to Get Bikini Ready" or some other such nonsense.

Thing is, it's not as simple as it sounds. If you're already overweight and out of shape the last thing in the world you want to do is take the stairs and arrive at your destination out of breath and dripping with sweat. They might as well tell you "take a 20 mile bike ride in the Sahara in the dead of summer."

"Take the stairs" is probably best suited for once you've been working out a little bit. Once you can take a walk, push a stroller, cajole a screaming baby, and talk on the phone all at the same time and without running out of breath in the first five minutes. (Ten minutes? Now, that's a different story). We gotta face it: stairs are some serious business!

Last night, my husband and I took our boys to a baseball game. Since the hubs drug his feet on ordering the tickets. we ended up on the - dun dun du dun - dreaded third level. When we exited the stadium after the game, the lines were the escelators were so long they practically wrapped around the building. I looked at the hubs and said four words I never would have imagined would ever leak from my lips, "Let's take the stairs."

Granted, we were going down which I realize is a whole different story from going up. But each level had several flights of stairs. I lost count, but I know we traipsed down at least TEN. Ten flights of stairs! And I did this all with a not-quite-three month old strapped to my chest and hauling a diaper bag that weighed more than the baby. By the time we reached the bottom, I was only slightly winded.

And I was proud.

Proud of myself for suggesting the stairs. Proud of myself for making it down them and only being slightly breathless. As we walked to our car, I was able to carry on a conversation with the hubs. AFTER negotiating all those stairs! I swear, it's the little things when it comes to this weight loss business, but maaaaan - that felt good to me. All the hours I'm logging and the miles I'm riding on my exercise bike are paying off. And not just on the scale or in the way my clothes fit me. And that is an awesome - really, truly, oh-em-gee type of awesome - feeling.

Daily Menu for Wednesday:

Breakfast:
Apple blueberry pancakes
Total Points: 4

Lunch:
Mini Bagel Pizzas
Quaker Mini-Delights
Total Points: 6

Snack:
Brownie Sundae
Total Points: 3

Dinner:
Chicken Cordon Bleu
Mashed Potatoes
Green Beans
Garlic Bread
Total Points: 9

Snack
Jello Fizzy Mold
Total Points: 1

Daily Total: 23

Tough Stuff

I don't think my "lifestyle change" challanges are the same as what a lot of other people face. For most people, it's finding time to exercise. That's kind of a non-issue for me because I do it when my boys are sleeping. I'm fortunate that they both go down for afternoon naps at the same time so I can work out then. They are (generally) both in bed by 8:00 so I can get in another little workout after I put them to sleep at night. So exercising isn't an issue. I don't have foods that I just absolutely crave and miss because I'm figuring out new, healthier alternatives. Sure, there are some days when I'd just about saw my arm off for a Strawberry Limeade from Sonic but I know that I'd rather fit into my favorite little black dress on New Years than to have a few moments of taste bud pleasure.

My biggest challange is night time snacking. I've always been a night time eater. I can stick with my menus just fine during the day and not feel any hunger pains. But once 8:00 or 9:00 hits, I feel as though I'm starving (even though I'm really not) and it takes everything in my power to keep from rummaging through the fridge and cabinets.

When I began our new healthy eating, I decided that all our meals would be eaten before 6:00 p.m. No snacks, no nothing after 6:00. This way, we'd have more time to burn off whatever we'd eaten before going to sleep. And it's honestly been tougher than giving up my cokes, my frozen milky ways, my boxes of chocolate covered raisins. And it's especially hard when my baby wakes up during the night. He's gotten better about sleeping in 8-10 hour stretches. But there's still the occasional night every now and then when he wakes me up at 2:00. And all I wanna do while I feed him is feed myself!

I am really trying hard not to give into these night time cravings. I keep thinking that once I get my body used to this new eating schedule then the cravings will be few and far between. I didn't do myself any favors when I was pregnant . . . if I woke up at 3 in the morning and wanted a club sandwhich, then two minutes later I was in the kitchen frying up bacon and toasting bread.

This too shall pass, this too shall pass . . .

I don't have a daily menu for tomorrow because, well, that's my other challange: the hubs is home. He works out of town and - buh-lieve me - it is MUCH easier to stick to eating right when he's not around. He encourages me on my weight loss, but also has been known to leave a kitkat or two laying around. Grr. I manage to do good while he's here, but I also use the time that he's here to use my flex points. I'm not sure WHAT I'll eat tomorrow therefore I can't put it on a menu. We're going to a ballgame tomorrow night so I'm pretty sure I see a lemon chill and hotdog in my future . . .

Since I won't have anytime to get on here tomorrow, I did go ahead and plan for Tuesday. So here is Tuesday's menu:

Breakfast:
1/4 cup egg beaters
1 slice turkey bacon
1 piece wheat toast
1 kiwi fruit
Total: 4 points

Lunch:
Ham and cheese sandwhich
Chips
Total: 5 points

Snack
WW icecream bar
Total: 2 points

Dinner
Grilled chicken breast
Twice baked potato
Green beans
Total: 8 points

Snack:
WW chocolate cake
Total: 1 point

Daily Total: 20

It's Like Crack to Me, Yo!

I discovered the Hungry Girl website a couple weeks ago and have been abso-freakin-lutely addicted to it. I scour through the archives to find old-to-them, new-to-me recipes. I purchased the cookbook. I wait anxiously for the daily emails (you'd be surprised the things you get excited about when you spend your days wipin' hinies and having boogers randomly handed to you). The thing I love the most about Hungry girl, however, is that she taught me the art of faux frying. I could hump Lisa Lillien on her leg for that alone.

I am a southern girl, born and raised. And if there's anything we do right down here it's FRY our food. If you can dream it up, we can fry it up. I think that's one reason I love carnivals so much. There is everything there from the classic (fried) funnel cakes to the off-the-wall things such as fried coke.

I know all about oven-fried chicken. My Aunt Hester has a recipe for that so good it would make you slap your Mama. Scratch that. It's so good it would make you slap your Grandmama. However. With all the "dash of this" and "pinch of that" she adds to it -- you might as well pick up a bucket of extra crispy at KFC for all the fat and calories you're consuming.

Thanks to Hungry Girl, though, I've learned about Fiber One cereal (I didn't even know it existed!) and how to combine it with all my favorite seasonings (garlic salt, paprika, season salt, I could go on and on) and egg beaters to "faux fry" just about anything. Tonight I made the onion rings with a recipe provided in the HG cookbook. I also made the chicken strips. I had a little bit of the crushed up cereal left. A little bit of egg beaters left. And a jar of pickles in the fridge. One of my favorite foods in the whole wide world is fried pickles dipped in a mustard/ ketchup mix.

Yup, I faux-fried pickles. And they were GOOD! Definitely one to add to the recipe file.

Yesterday was weigh-in, but it was also sofreakinbusythesekidsaredrivingmenuts-o that I did not get a chance to take progression pics. So I took them today and *gasp* I wore shorts to take them in! Since this b-log is still new, I'll do the true progression. From this point on, I'll just add that week's pictures.

About-to-pop pregnant -
Ya don't EVEN wanna know how much I weighed here!

May '08 -- 20 pounds gone:

July '08 -- 37 pounds gone:

August 2, 08 -- 39 pounds gone & still thunder thighin' it!

A side view -- I dunno if that "I HAD TWO C-SECTIONS" tummy will ever go away!:

Sunday's Menu:

Breakfast
Baked pears with Cool Whip
Total Points: 2

Lunch:
Chicken Strips (leftov-ahs, baybay!)
Mashed Potatoes
Green Beans
Total: 6 Points

Snack:
WW Chocolate Dessert Cake
Total: 4 pts

Dinner:
Taco Salad
Total Points: 7

Snack:
Apple Slices
Total Points: 1

Total Daily Points: 20

Minus Two!

Friday mornings are weigh-in days. I actually get excited when I weigh-in and have stuck with my program for the week. I know the scale is going to move so it's nice to stand there and see the number go down from what it was the previous week.

And this week it was down by 2 pounds! Yay! Last week, I somehow managed to melt 4 pounds off and while I would have loved, loved, loved to have seen another four gone . . . minus two still works for me.

My next mini-goal is to have a total of ten pounds gone by Labor Day. If I can lose that, I'll be at the weight I was last April. As it stands, I weigh about what I did this time last year. I never expected baby weight to be gone so fast and now I'm slowly but surely chipping away at those 20 "alcohol-and-fast food" pounds.

Menu for Saturday:

Breakfast:
2 slices cinnamon toast on wheat bread
1 Apple
Total: 3 points

Lunch:
Bacon/ Cheese Melt
Gerber veggie puffs
Total: 7 points

Snack:
WW Icecream bar
Total: 1 point

Dinner:
Faux fried chicken strips
Onion rings
Macaroni and cheese
Total: 9 points

Snack:
Frozen Grapes
Total: 1 point

Total Daily Points: 21